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 I am here to tell you the truth about
autism. It isn’t always pretty, but sometimes it’s beautiful. My
name is Bobbi Sheahan. My husband, Ben, and I have four
children. From the beginning, Grace, our second-born, was
different. Her behavior ranged from quirky to baffling – and
sometimes frightening. When Grace was three, we received
confirmation of what we had already figured out through trial
and error: Grace has autism. It was because of the three years
of “trial and error” that I
teamed up with Grace’s psychologist, Kathy DeOrnellas, Ph.D.,
to write What I Wish I'd Known About Raising a Child With
Autism: A Mom and a Psychologist Offer Heartfelt Advice for the
First Five Years (Future Horizons, April 2011). We hope to
spare other parents some of the pain, discouragement, and
confusion that can accompany the early years of parenting a
child who has or may have autism.
I am a lawyer who transitioned to
full-time motherhood in my thirties. We wanted a big family, and
we had our first two children in our first two years of
marriage. When Grace, who is fifteen months younger than her
older sister, was an infant, she was quiet. So quiet that we
began to notice that she didn’t babble or make many sounds at
all. She didn’t cry when you’d expect a baby to cry: not when
she got her shots, and not even when she was hurt. Not ever. Not
even stitches-to-the face hurt (twice). She didn’t nap,
and, as time went by, she made no moves towards speaking or
potty training. Frightened by Grace’s fearlessness, her ability
to defeat childproofing, and her propensity to injure herself,
more than one babysitter refused to come back.
 Around the age of three, Grace began
to speak in precocious bursts: the entire script of a cartoon,
complete with voices; her favorite storybook; all twelve days of
Christmas; the whole 23rd Psalm. She didn’t make eye
contact, and she patrolled the perimeter of the playground
instead of playing with other kids. She loved the swings, and
she seemed not to understand when she injured other people. Her
senses seemed to be completely miscalibrated; her hearing was
acute, yet she took an inordinate time to process the speech of
others who spoke to her. She still didn’t feel pain; I still
cringe at the story of the time that Grace grabbed a hot light
bulb and didn’t respond to the burn, but did cry and cover her
ears at my shriek as I pulled her hand from the lamp. Believe it
or not, that wasn’t the worst light bulb incident; when she was
three, Grace ate a light bulb. Well, part of a light
bulb. She began eating other things, too, including my
anniversary roses.
 “Of course it isn’t autism,” I would
say. “She’s affectionate. Plus, she’s a girl – what are the
odds?” (More than 80 percent of those diagnosed with autism are
male.) A near-tragedy finally moved us to discover Grace’s
autism. As I read everything that I could get my hands on, I was
shocked to realize that a book like What I Wish I’d Known
About Raising a Child With Autism didn’t already exist. I
suggested to Dr. DeOrnellas that we write this book to spare
other parents some agony, some confusion, and perhaps some lost
time and resources.
What I Wish I'd Known About Raising
a Child With Autism is my
third book. My first two books, published by Texas Lawyer Press
(a division of American Lawyer Media), are reference books for
attorneys:
All About Texas Law and Kids, with
Michelle May O'Neil, Claudia
Cano and Sharon Ramage
(2010, Texas Lawyer Press, a
division of American Lawyer
Media)
When I left my law practice to turn my full attention
to writing and motherhood, little did I know where that path
would lead. For two decades, I used my writing to persuade
courts and educate lawyers, but it was in becoming a mother that
I truly found my voice, my inspiration, and my life’s
work. This book is not only the story of my family’s journey of
discovery, but my love letter to my daughter and my message of
hope for parents. |
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